Inexperience sometimes makes you understand things in the hardest way possible. Volatility, manipulation, and lack of knowledge in any type of market always imply risks. Just as they were losses, they could also have been gains. That's how it is when you rely solely on luck. In the end, it will all be an experience, a painful experience. You need to correct the way of operating, train in a more focused manner understanding and learning everything related to the market and the strategies that exist.